With the rise of online dating sites and apps, more and more people are choosing to seek relationships or find their soulmate through the web.
However, despite the apparent convenience of being able to browse hundreds of profiles without leaving home, there are many disadvantages to online dating with apps; for many, it is an inferior experience compared to meeting in person.
First of all, online dating does not allow you to experience the emotions of live dates: no gestures, no facial expressions, no mimicry; it doesn’t let you see the other person’s true personality or understand if there is a real connection. Online dating, both for men and women, often relies solely on physical appearance: usually a photo or, worse, a brief profile; it doesn’t allow you to truly get to know the person.
Can Dating Be Dangerous?
Online dating can be full of scams and people lying about all sorts of things: identity, age, profession, and so on. Dating, among other things, has the unfortunate habit of making people feel constantly in competition with others: it makes people feel like they’re racing to attract the attention of a potential partner. While it’s possible to sense someone’s narcissism through a phone screen and conversations, in person it’s a whole different story.
Online Dating on Social Networks Is Less Authentic
A widely perceived problem with online dating is that it’s used to present unrealistic versions of oneself. Most users present themselves in a better light, using specific photos where they look younger or even digitally altered for the occasion. These features make it difficult to understand if the person you’re talking to truly deserves love or just a few emojis.
Online Dating With Apps Is Less Exciting
Online dating can be convenient, undoubtedly, but it’s a pastime that unfortunately leaves little lasting impact and doesn’t allow those who practice it to fully immerse themselves in the whole human relational experience. The first kiss, the first hug, the first signs of love: all these tend to be diminished by online dating practices.
Is Online Dating Less Effective for Finding Love?
We may sound a bit naive saying this, but we think it’s hard to say otherwise: online dating apps are generally less effective than meeting in person. Although there are many more opportunities to meet interesting people, the chances of finding a soulmate are decidedly lower.
There are many answers to this question, covering the entire spectrum of human emotion: expectations tied to virtual communication on apps like Tinder don’t match reality for both women and men.
Focusing on in-person meetings is, for the reasons described above, one of the most important reasons why it’s better to aim for face-to-face encounters. Truly getting to know someone and sensing a real connection through shared experiences can really make a difference.
How to Meet in Person Effectively
To meet in person effectively, it’s important to follow some simple rules.
Choosing the Right Environments
To avoid being tied to dating sites, the most important thing is to spend some time understanding which environments are right. For example, if you’re interested in meeting guys or girls with cultural interests similar to yours, it’s best to attend art exhibitions or concerts; if you’re looking for someone more sporty, why not join a fitness class or gym sessions?
Organized In-Person Meetings: The Perfect Solution
A smart way to meet people in person is to participate in so-called “organized meetings.” These can be specific events like singles parties or speed dating, but can also simply be groups of people who regularly meet to share common interests.
This option is perfect for those who don’t have much time to frequent specific places or who want to meet people focusing on social aspects. Organized in-person meetings are often “mediated” by experts who try to create relaxed atmospheres and make it easier to break the ice among participants.
BeSociable
Sociability is undoubtedly the most important thing to develop to meet new people. Being sociable means “showing willingness” to interact with others, smiling, showing interest, being able to perceive others’ feelings; it’s a complex topic that we try to break down.
How to Become More Sociable
To become more sociable, there are some things we can do:
- Be proactive. Don’t wait for others to come to you; go to them. Start conversations, ask how they are, show interest in their interests.
- Be genuine. Don’t try to be someone else; be yourself. Others will appreciate your authenticity and will be more willing than ever to talk to someone who radiates sincerity.
- Be positive. Try to see the bright side of things and convey this positivity to others; people are attracted to positive and optimistic individuals.
- Be curious. Showing interest in others and asking even personal questions helps find topics for discussion and encourages people to open up.
- Never forget availability. Be willing to help others and pay attention when they speak. Others will surely come to appreciate a person’s availability, and this perceived kindness will make it easier for you to interact with others.
How to Improve Your Social Skills
So how to improve social skills? There are some tricks that can be useful:
- Learning to communicate effectively is the first: being clear and concise always helps.
- Use language appropriate to the context.
- Learn to listen actively to others.
- Learn to manage conflicts, resolving them or simply not escalating tense situations further.
- Manage emotions: naming how you feel and helping others understand their feelings can be useful to improve social skills.
- Relational skills: to relate to others in a healthy and lasting way, you need to understand what relationships are, how to create positive situations for them, and when it’s time to end toxic relationships.
Don’t Be Too Demanding
You know the saying, “He who wants too much ends up with nothing”?
Well: meeting the right person is definitely not easy and often takes a lot of time, but getting discouraged helps no one. Finding the perfect person is an activity that requires a lot of time but doesn’t exclude the possibility of meeting other people and having fun in the meantime.
Having an open attitude, being willing to meet new people, not having prejudices, and not fixating on a single type of person are things that should never be forgotten. The most beautiful and lasting relationships often come from unexpected meetings, so it’s good to try to maximize the time you have a positive and open attitude towards others.
Never forget, among other things, the fun of meeting new people. Even if you don’t find your soulmate, meeting new people, discovering new cultures, exploring new passions are treasures that can enrich us as individuals.
Online dating undoubtedly has many disadvantages compared to meeting in person, and therefore the latter should be considered preferable.
To meet effectively in person, it’s important to choose the right environments, be sociable, not be too demanding, and have a positive and open attitude towards new acquaintances.
If you’re looking for an Italian community for in-person meetings, we recommend discovering Meeters; one of the best for meeting new people, finding interesting singles, or attending exclusive events.
Sign up now at Meeters and start living new emotions right away.