How to Keep a Conversation Alive on a Chat or Site for Making Friends Online?
Making friends online is a topic often discussed: is it possible to find friends through apps? How do you approach chats? How do you chat and talk about your interests with other users and turn them into new people in your life?
There’s one factor often overlooked when it comes to making friends online: how to manage the conversation with someone potentially interested in friendship but who doesn’t know us yet. Often, chats that could be enjoyable fall flat and die early due to impersonal and standard messages.
It’s no surprise: when you have many chats going and are busy as we usually are in everyday life, it’s tempting to write a quick “how’s it going?” or other unoriginal phrases that don’t engage potential friends.
Instead, saying something more specific to the person is much more likely to get a response.
Getting and keeping someone’s attention doesn’t have to be a complicated feat: we all have lives, especially as adults.
But you can adopt simple tricks: following these tips should help create more engaging conversations and, hopefully, lasting and meaningful connections.
Address People by Name
When you’re on a friendship app, the easiest way to show someone you’ve paid attention to their profile is to use their name in your opening message.
It’s a warm, personalized way to say: here I am, nice to meet you!
Ask Them a Tailored Question
Without being intrusive or inappropriate, keep it light and show your sense of humor, but with curiosity (in other words, don’t be self-centered). You can start with something from their bio or photos.
Their favorite places, their travels or hikes they’ve done, or more generally, their tastes in movies or music.
To make friends online, you need to be specific in your chat: you have few clues, you lack the warmth of shared live moments, nonverbal language, etc. So you have to make a little extra effort.
Use Emojis
At first, use them to lighten the conversation, not make it seem too serious, or to clarify your mood. A smile, a waving hand, an “ok” in response to a positive answer work well at the start of a chat. To make friends online effectively, remember the other person can’t read your mind or guess your mood: help them out with emojis!
Once the conversation is underway, emojis can help make it more fun and lively. For example, you might send an emoji referring to a movie, place, or animal you both love.
Of course, they must be contextualized, otherwise the person won’t understand what kind of communication you’re trying to have and may find you cryptic, lazy, or get bored quickly. Use them to illustrate your different interests, like fitness, camping, and reading.
And don’t overdo it: no need to send 10 red roses, a laughing sun, and five kisses in a row!
Give Compliments
What do people, really everyone, like? Feeling good about themselves. So be genuine and let someone know they caught your interest – and why.
As the conversation goes on, you can continue with compliments. When the opportunity arises, tell them you enjoy talking with them, that you think their job or one of their hobbies is really cool, or that they have good taste. Naturally, only give sincere compliments and avoid those based on appearance, which risk crossing a line and embarrassing the person. Again, moderation is key.
Ask Deeper Questions
It’s easy for a conversation to drift toward the weather, current events, or the series you’re watching, but you’ll connect more deeply with someone if you also touch on topics meaningful to both of you, like work, family, hobbies, or worldviews.
Ask questions that aren’t intrusive but allow you to share what matters to you too, like things you enjoy doing, good habits, or hopes for the future.
Follow Every Answer with Another Question
The quickest way to kill a conversation is to answer a question with just your reply (one-word answers are even worse). If you want the conversation to continue, respond with a question.
Think of the dialogue like a ping pong game: if one player stops returning the ball, it drops and the game ends!
Send Messages When People Can Respond
Timing is everything: it’s easy to lose someone’s attention in a chat if you send a message while they’re sleeping, at work, or otherwise unavailable. They might not see it or might see it and then forget.
If you know the person works regular office hours, for example, write in the evening to keep the momentum going.
